If you know me at all you know I’m not a neat person. (If you know me well you’re probably snort-laughing and thinking, “THAT’S an understatement.”) So keeping our house clean is something that happens…pretty much never. It’s not that I LIKE the mess. Or that I don’t SEE the mess. I just can’t get it together enough to keep things clean. I wish I had my mom’s super-power of not sitting down until everything is done. (So, never.) ALAS, I do not. The couch calls to me. Anyway. I’ve tried various methods to do better with the upkeep, but so far nothing has worked. Or really helped even. But despite my MANY failures, I thought the other day that maybe I should get on pinterest and find a cleaning schedule that I could follow.
Y’all. What I found is INSANE. I’ve come to the conclusion that none of these people have children. Here’s some of the stuff I came across.
Wiping down all your baseboards as a weekly thing. (Do people DO that?!)
A schedule that included only 2 loads of laundry a week. We generate like 2 loads of laundry A DAY.
Basically every schedule suggests starting the dishwasher after dinner and unloading it in the morning. We run the dishwasher twice a day. AT LEAST. And you know what happens if I don’t? We have no clean dishes to eat off of.
Sweeping the kitchen floor as a weekly chore. We have 2 kids in high chairs. Sweeping in the kitchen is, AGAIN, something that gets done multiple times a day. (And okay, that isn’t the WHOLE kitchen, but STILL. If I only swept once a week there would be literal piles of food on the floor.)
One listed vacuum as a daily chore but then followed that with “as needed” in parentheses. Listen schedule writer. If I were on top of doing stuff “as needed” I WOULDN’T NEED A SCHEDULE.
Washing walls as a weekly chore. I…don’t understand. If something gets on a wall I wipe it off. Are other people wiping down entire random walls? Seems like you’d spend a LOT of time doing that.
One schedule included taking out the garbage “if it’s full.” I don’t need to be reminded of that. If it’s full I take it out. You might as well write “change toilet paper if the roll is empty.” I may be the ONLY person in the house who DOES, but I do.
Sometime it’s the amount of time that makes the schedule seem crazy. For instance: a “15-20 minutes of cleaning a day” includes “vacuum house” as an item. I…how big is your house? It takes me 15 minutes to vacuum our basement. Which is one of FOUR levels. (And our house is not huge!) Also, that doesn’t include time to pick up all the crap off the floor so I CAN ACTUALLY VACUUM.
Anyway. All this to say: cleaning schedules are crap and my house is probably always going to be a mess.